Praise The Lard!

Praise The Lard and Pass The Ammo!
Praise the Lard
Pass the ammo
Russian Roulette
Is your gamble

Load that gun
Pull the trigger
Now you feel
So much bigger

Praise the Lard
Church and state
Christian Soldiers
Nationalist hate

Send your money
To the rich
There's nothing left
You stupid bitch

Take up sides
Against ourselves
Hate your brother
Everyone else

Work for evil
Men of greed
Men in power
The devils seed

Money changers
Profits (prophets) of doom
Take your money
Give you gloom

Its too late
You'll never learn
Smell the smoke
As America Burns

Today’s song came about after I wrote the bass line – I wanted it to be sort of punk-ish – and simple blues progression came out – which is somewhat related – since many garage bands first learn very simple blues progressions and repeat them ad nauseum.

I usually get my lyrics ideas from either “current events”, historical events or inventions, nature, or one of my many Assemblage pieces – and today’s is using an Assemblage as my guide. The vocals also begged to be sung as if I were a Televangelist. Hey – I will use this approach again – it infuses comedy in a way that really works well.

The vocals are influenced by listening to Primus do “Jerry Was a Race Car Driver” – which is hilarious – as most Primus songs are.

I Was Born For The Stage

I might finally be over my fear of singing and thinking my voice is awful.

Here’s the funny back story of that last song. Michael Stipe, one of a handful of my favorite rock singers, used to love to do a bad Elvis impression. I thought, “What if I tried a Michael Stipe impression of him singing Elvis Style.

My wife and a few others said, no joke, it’s not terrible singing. I really do want to sing I’ve been deathly afraid of it …..

I was born for the stage
I was born to sing
Countless fans adore me
For my uncertain gift

My heart is on fire
I'm alight with desire
To paint the town red
Everyone is my friend

My adoring fans
Call me Saint
Its my singing
And the sounds that I paint

Horror Show

Step right up
Step inside
For tonight
I'm your guide

See the freak show
In D.C
Mental midgets
On T.V

Parade of lawyers
Parade of clowns
Tried to bring
Democracy down

Foolish followers
Idiot tools
False idol worship
Pumpkin Man Fool

Step right up
Step inside
At the door
Lose your pride



KON AM-666 Radio: Your Brown Eye in the Sky!

The KON-AM 666 : “Your Brown Eye in The Sky”
Won’t You Make Time for Jesus?

If I were to have a Pirate Radio Station, I’d call it KON Radio. The Flying Brown Eye or Flaming Brown Eye would be the logo. There would be an ongoing joke about Kahn of Star Trek fame (Ricardo Montalban).

My Favorite Ricardo Montalban Character

His early “Rich Corinthian Leather” commercials would be factored in.

Up in the sky
Way up high
So close to heaven
Your flaming brown eye

An eye with wings
Good luck it brings
Right hand of God
Attached are no strings

Jesus loves you (if you)
Pay your annual dues
Make Time For Jesus
You cannot lose
My Favorite Ricardo Montalban Commercial

Ricardo Montalban had quite an extraordinary career – when I read the Wiki on him I learned a few tidbits I didn’t know about him. He certainly seemed to have a great career, long marriage and was thankful for his opportunities.

Captain Jerk

The jokes about “Rich Corinthian Leather” and yelling “Kaaaaaaaaaahn!” works perfectly for KON Radio.

The Max Grifter Power Hour on KON-AM 666 Radio

Reverend Max Grifter
Reading Proverbs 6:6-6
Step right up
Watch him pray
He will take
Your money away

To buy a jet
And Crystal Cathedral
Patriot Cultists
Jesus Needs You

In his name
On Holy Cross
Max Grifters Win
Is your loss

Don't walk!
You must run
Even The Meek
Have joined in The Fun

Won't you
Make Time For Jesus?
Send your money
That would please us

Won’t You Make Time For Jesus?

Snivelling Little Rat Faced Git

Imagine Waking Up Late at Night to Find This Creep in Your Living Room

This little shit is one creepy dude . . .

Halloween 666 Series #6: Halloween Bicycle Parade


The Full Set and Cast
Balcony Ghost Player Piano
Beautiful Bike!
Two Clowns on a Tricycle. Nice Entry!
OK – Brooms are Acceptable as Bikes
Last Train Leaves the Station Soon
Late Entry in the Parade
Drama Queen . . .
The Circus Seems to Have Unicycle Entry
The Raven is Perched on the KAW Radio AM-666 Microphone
Butterfly With Angel Wings – This Years Parade Winning Entry!
High Above The Madding Crowd

This was fun – I pulled out all the stops this year because I am so relieved (and eternally thankful) that we are healing from last year with its Smoke, Pandemic, Trump / Politics, Power Outages due to Fire Danger – have I left anything out?

Now lets pray for rain. I expect to do one Thanksgiving / Christmas set and photo shoot – but my thing is Harvest Festival and Halloween – and Thanksgiving – which is a Harvest Festival. I’m a Pagan I think . . . .

Final Halloween 666 Series Episode Plan

Fun and Light Hearted

I’ll end this series with a bike parade in the town that has the Train Station, Haunted House, Cemetery and Circus.

Bad Assed

It will be Trick or Treat based, with “the kids” the star of the show. No entrails or other macabre stuff this time – just puppets and skeletons on bikes.

Stay tuned.

Halloween 666 Series #5: Circuscide

Everyone Loves a Circus!

Todays song is a joke – I used the chords and notes to spell out “CABBAGE” – since all of these letters are also musical notes / chords. I was a bit lazy today, but it was still a lot of fun.

Punch, in the Nosebleed Seats
Send in the Clowns . . .
Special Guest Star on the 88’s
Domestic Dispute on Top of the Piano!
This Circus is a Barrel of Laughs – Good Wholesome Fun for the Entire Family
Who Wouldn’t Want to be Here?
Step Right Up!
Parting Shot

Happy Entrails

I’ll paint the big top stripes on next

This weekends Halloween 666 Special #5 will be by far the most macabre of the series, but it will also be the funniest.

Design Drawing

I’m in my own virtual world, but unlike Online virtual world’s, mine has power tools and paint.